Let’s talk about “Sex” baby

Let’s talk about “Hair” baby

Let’s talk about all the good things and the bad things that maybe …..

As I’m sitting here thinking of a creative name for the blog, I’m worried to not offend anyone, but then I think to myself, if I can’t be transparent with my audience than I’m probably not helping anyone by lying. I was not born saved and innocent, so please pardon my truth as I always hope to enlighten and encourage someone else.

I grew up wearing a relaxer and knowing absolutely nothing about taking care of my hair, let alone being natural. I was never taught to love my hair because for the majority of my life I was told my hair texture, quality and length sucked. Forget the images of beauty on television, there were no affirmation within my immediate surrounding to remind me of the beauty of just loving my own hair.

For those who knew me from the end of High School throughout College, I wore a lot of straight/curly weave. I enjoyed looking beautiful, the attention I received, the control I thought I had. There’s nothing like having fresh bundles of weave in your hair, fresh out the salon, edges laid and ready for whatever the evening held. I was addicted, hooked and couldn’t get enough. The few times I would have my hair out I would already be plotting on the next bundle of hair. After college I started wearing wigs and that just really opened up a whole new selection of fun options.

As my hair cravings were met so were my sexual desires. I had no consideration for God let alone how deeper in sin I fell. My look had become my idol and I loved the attention that came with it. Though, I am not discrediting natural beauty but I know that I did not feel complete without my hair being straightened. Hair in the black community is a wide subject matter to cover because every black woman has their own personal opinion about it AND the world does too. So for the sake of an open hair forum I will say, it is in my opinion that when you are not comfortable with your own hair it does affect your self confidence and the way you view your image.

There is beauty in owning what is yours. From your head to your toes, you were specifically designed to be you. If God needed you to have a bigger, smaller, longer, shorter (Insert that thing you wish you had) he would have created you to have it. It is not by mistake God chose the exact qualities he needed you to have because it is probably what he felt you could handle. Though I can honestly say I am no longer that young naive girl anymore but I still have to wake up each day reminding myself of how beautifully designed God created me to be. If I choose to wear fake hair at this point, it is an add on that I choose to do. I love who I am naturally.

Please don’t get me wrong there is nothing wrong with straight hair. I am not saying only women with weave, straight hair make poor decisions, it is just merely my past observation of self.

Maybe you don’t wear fake hair, maybe you have a different bond.  Could it be you have fake personality every time you get around certain people to get attention? Or you hide behind pounds of makeup and wear certain clothing, hoping to get chosen when you go out? As for the guys, the fresh cut, fancy car and parties can only get you laid so many times until you start acting out of character, having thoughts of suicide because you have all those past lover’s spirits on you (soul ties). Or maybe you don’t want anyone to know your addiction to _____ so you try to appear the perfect Church attendee.

We all have or have had a bond to something that may have caused us to make poor decisions in our life. It’s unfortunate that many won’t address it because there’s no room to be honest in the circles they’re in, including some churches (no shade but the truth).

These days my hair is in Sisterlocks, which may I add is one of thee best decisions I have made to be in my life. This decision was made after a couple years of contemplation and being bonded to every other hair but my own. I’m four years in and I have not looked back.